I ran across that most the fresh stereotypes where Europeans was basically described in addition to used on united states

I ran across that most the fresh stereotypes where Europeans was basically described in addition to used on united states

Broadening right up, We established men Seznamka started to focus on the differences between Italy and you may Kosovo with respect to understanding lifetime, in particular about that material. Discover a phrase that always been used by Albanian someone and i both nonetheless tune in to. Whenever a child becomes partnered, mom and dad and family relations state, “We hitched him.” That doesn’t make any feel conceptually, that chooses to marry and you will does it. It isn’t the rest which go for you.

I desired knowing like that off defining some thing, thus i made a decision to read Lek Dukagjini’s “Kanun.” Within this text message, I suppose I came across an answer. Within the posts, it states that everyone works together with wedding with the exception of the couple. This is why it makes sense to say that “we partnered him.” Because the at the time, most of the ilies worried. The couple don’t maintain anything, sometimes they don’t actually choose or such as both.

Moments keeps changed while never hear about instances like those anymore – about, I really hope maybe not. But a germ of the mindset enjoys remained. The stress exerted because of the members of the family and you will relatives requirements both you and leads one to build like a choice.

Just what have remained widespread is the idea of “giving” or “taking” a female. Even today, people still tune in to from their group it is ideal for these to learn how to carry out certain things at home, because when it leave due to their husbands they’ll not need to look bad. Things like washing the house, food preparation, helping caj (tea) and the like.

The idea that the lady is the target of one’s kid remains. Something a father decides to provide or not. That is what prospects of a lot to find married immediately after a preliminary duration of knowing both, because it usually happens one a women’s father looks and you can says to the brand new kid to choose how to proceed – marry or end – due to the fact his girl is not a doll.

The feminine intercourse has been recognized as an item

Increasing upwards, I additionally noticed that all stereotypes for which Europeans had been described together with applied to all of us. Some body been divorcing, luckily. We say that just like the We imagine the lifetime of a woman, given in marriage and maybe even partnered of the her very own usually, locked-up in the home by the stereotypical Albanian boy, whom suppresses you from meeting and you can starting regular public circumstances. I consider that it girl choosing the bravery – owing to a more open community – to depart one house and you will return to independence.

The concept of separation and divorce almost didn’t occur for all of us, as the people did not challenge to leave the person they married. But I discovered our anybody also provide partners, which our individuals and get married for personal get. In short, that people are not much better than anybody else. We’re not prime as well as the “others” commonly new devil.

I am aware when I get married a keen Albanian lady, everything was marvelous.

As well as having been lucky enough to expand up in the a developed nation particularly Italy, being able to research rather than which have needed to alive from war, You will find the massive fortune of obtaining two parents that have never ever helped me feel this sort of pressure. However, I feel it anyway, because that proper care was born in my lead extended in the past.

If i wed to a low-Albanian girl, exactly how will my mothers be seen? Just how will i be considered? Who’ll arrived at my house once the an invitees when the my personal spouse does not cam Albanian? Often she actually ever journey to Kosovo? Just how do we identity our kids? Have a tendency to our children speak Albanian?